Jia Xu said, "Liu Biao loves to have to do with famous people. If some famous scholar should be sent to him, he would submit forthwith."

So Cao Cao inquired of Xun You who was the best person to go as a messenger, and he recommended Kong Rong. Cao Cao agreed and sent Xun You to speak with this officer.

Xun You went to Kong Rong, saying, "A scholar of reputation is required to aid as a messenger of state. Can you undertake this task?"

Kong Rong replied, "I have a certain friend, Mi Heng, whose talents are ten times mine. He ought to be constantly at the court of the Emperor and not merely be sent as a state messenger. I will recommend him to the Emperor."

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The Emperor read the memorial and passed it to his Prime Minister, who duly summoned Mi Heng. He came, but after his formal salutations were over, he was left standing and not invited to sit down.

Looking up to heaven, Mi Heng sighed deeply, saying, "Wide as is the universe, it cannot produce the person."

"Under my orders are scores of people whom the world call heroes. What do you mean by saying there is not the person," said Cao Cao.

"I should be glad to hear who they are," said Mi Heng.

"Xun Yu, Xun You, Guo Jia, and Cheng Yu are all people of profound skill and long views, superior to Xiao He* and Chen Ping*. Zhang Liao, Xu Chu, Li Dian, and Yue Jing are bravest of the brave, better than Cen Peng* and Ma Wu*. Lu Qian and Man Chong are my secretaries; Yu Jin and Xu Huang are my van leaders;Xiahou Dun is one of the world's marvels, Cao Ren is the most successful leader of the age. Now say you there are not the people?"

"Sir, you are quite mistaken," said Mi Heng with a smile. "I know all these things you call people. Xun Yu is qualified to pose at a funeral or ask after a sick man; Xun You is fit to be a tomb guardian; Cheng Yu might be sent to shut doors and bolt windows; and Guo Jia is a reciter of poems; Zhang Liao might beat drums and clang gongs; Xu Chu might lead cattle to pasture; Yue Jing would make a fair reader of elegy; Li Dian could carry dispatches and notices; Lu Qian would be a fair armorer; Man Chong could be sent to drink wine and eat brewers' grains; Yu Jin might be of use to carry planks and build walls; Xu Huang might be employed to kill pigs and slay dogs;Xiahou Dun should be styled 'Whole Body General,' and Cao Ren should be called 'Money-grubbing Governor.' As for the remainder, they are mere clothes shelves, rice sacks, wine vases, flesh bags."

"And what special gifts have you?" said Cao Cao angrily.

"I know everything in heaven above and the earth beneath. I am conversant with the Three Religions and the Nine Systems of Philosophy. I could make my prince the rival of Kings Yao and Shun, and I myself could compare in virtue with Confucius and Mencius.* Can I discuss on even terms with common people?"

Now Zhang Liao was present, and he raised his sword to strike down the impudent visitor who spoke thus to his master, but Cao Cao said, "I want another drummer boy to play on occasions of congratulation in the court. I will confer this office upon him."

Instead of indignantly declining this, Mi Heng accepted the position and went out.

"He spoke very impertinently," said Zhang Liao. "Why did you not put him to death?"

" He has something of a reputation; empty, but people have heard of him and so, if I put him to death, they would say I was intolerant.As he thinks he has ability, I have made him a drummer to mortify him."